Mad Muffin Disease

Is There Really Such a Thing?

Although rare, this form of Mad Muffin Disease is on the increase and has only recently come to light after the recent outbreak of BSE and mad sheep disease. You may be thinking that I am lying and that there is no such thing as Mad Muffin Disease but believe me, its real. There have only been a few reported cases of this disease all over the world and only 2 of these have proved fatal. The last know case was in 1962, when an American dairy farmer, who had a muffin everyday for breakfast for 20 years suddenly became very ill and died in hospital. Most cases, though are very mild and harmless.

You can catch Mad Muffin Disease from eating a muffin that has been in contact with cows or sheep and it is usually impossible to tell whether the muffin you eat is infected with the disease. The only signs there might be are if around the edges of the muffin there are small areas of white froth but as these areas are usually too small for the naked eye to see it is very difficult to detect. A muffin that contains high quantities of the disease when placed on a plate may start to shake and fall over. If you do eat a muffin that is infected with the disease then it is very ineffective and is only when you eat many muffins that carry it do you start to see the effects.
A Boy Turning into a Muffin

Unlike with BSE and Mad Sheep Disease, the symptoms of Mad Muffin Disease are very different. The most dangerous type of muffin is a chocolate muffin and it is with these muffins which you will start to notice the effects of the disease. They are very gradual and the first sign is being addicted to them. Then after that your skin starts to turn a darker colour and if you continue to eat the chocolate muffin then you change shape and eventually turn into one. The main problem is that the disease only predominantly shows on those who eat chocolate muffins. This is why the American Dairy Farmer died, because he ate Blueberry muffins for breakfast every morning. His wife did say that she had slowly noticed him turning a purply blue colour but she dismissed it as old age.

If you are any doubt about having contracted this disease then I recommend that you make an appointment with your doctor, email me or write to the Institute of Mad Muffin Disease, 228-230 Muffin Row, New York, USA, for more information.

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